One of my favorite pastimes is going to the movies. I love watching movies, and I especially love watching them at the theater. There’s just something about it that I… love. Anyway, now that I live with my sister and her 9-month-old, I don’t get to go to the movies nearly as often as I used to. The logistics are just too complicated. I don’t have a problem going to the theater by myself, but it just doesn’t feel right to tell my sis, “Hey, I’m going to the movies, see you later,” and then leave her at home with the baby. And finding a baby sitter for the occasion is not always cheap or convenient. So, when Star Trek hit theaters, I was in a pickle. Of all the movies ever made, Star Trek ones are my favorite. Yes, I’m a nerd, I know, it’s hilarious. Anyway, I was determined to see Star Trek at the theater. Fortunately, my sister wanted to go see it, too. The problem? Our scheduled baby sitter was sick. Big problem. We ultimately decided to go with a rather risky plan: We would see the latest show available and hope the baby would sleep through it. Read the rest of this entry »

There have been many lessons learned in this journey of being a “First Time Mom,” but so far, there have not been too many things about it that have just made me feel really stupid.  I consider myself to be well-educated — I have a college degree, I’ve lived and traveled around the world, and over all, I’ve always had pretty good common sense.  Well, this week, a seemingly simple, otherwise marvelous invention, has made me feel downright s-t-u-p-i-d!  If I had just thought for a moment about what I was about to do, you would think a light bulb would have come on, lightening would strike, and I would realize, “Uh, uh, uh… this is not a good idea.” But no, I robotically strapped my 9-month-old daughter into her car seat and made the hour-long journey home from the beach.  What’s the problem, you ask?  Well, at the risk of sounding obtuse, but for the sake of all you first-timers out there, allow me to share this lesson learned: Little Swimmers diapers are not like real diapers. Read the rest of this entry »

I don’t have any kids. I’m not married, or even in a relationship. I do, however, live with my sister and help take care of my baby neice. It’s a unique situation, to say the least. I can’t say I’m the most helpful — poopy diapers make me gag, as does anything involving saliva — but I try my best to help around the house and give my sister a break from time to time. Last night, for example, I folded a mountain of laundry the likes of which I had never tackled before. It was a gargantuan task, but it had to be done.

This little arrangement won’t last forever — someday I will be moving out and my neice will no longer be a baby — so I have compiled here a list of things I have learned during my time as a live-in aunt.

1. First smiles can make you cry. I was holding my neice when she smiled for the first time. We were about to go somewhere and needed to put her in her car seat, and I was shaking my head, smiling, and saying, “You don’t want to go in your car seat, do you?” when, lo and behold, she smiled right back at me. My sister was so jealous! I teared up almost immediately and cried for a few minutes before we left. Read the rest of this entry »

“If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers.” — Edgar W. Howe

“If you have never been hated by your child you have never been a parent.” — Bette Davis

“Parenthood is a lot easier to get into than out of.” — Bruce Lansky

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The telephone’s ringing, the TV is blaring.
Sister is crying’ cause Brother’s not sharing.
There’s a spill on the carpet that no one will claim.
There’s no time for sitting when Mommy’s your name.

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Some things we take for granted.  Like getting dressed.  Unless we are paraplegic, an absolute klutz or have just smoked far too much cabbage, getting dressed is a cinch.
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We have all heard how different our lives will be once we have our first child.  Here’s a look at the humorous side of that scenario.
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It is the age of email, and I have to say that I’m fundamentally grateful. One aspect of email that I’m not too thrilled about is the “FW: Helpful and Inspiring Advice” variety. It’s the new medium of choice for well meaning plagiarizers to pass along unsolicited and authoritative tidbits of information that they have no intention of following, either.
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Moms have learned to decipher the englinsh language in their own way.  Read these hilarious definitions of everyday common words which mean something entirely different to Dear Old Mom!
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When I was expecting my third baby, one of the first things I stressed to my obstetrician was my desire to be signed up for epidural anesthesia during delivery. My doctor looked at me confidently and said, “Oh, this is your third, you won’t need an epidural.” I guess maybe when “HE” delivered his third he didn’t need one but I sure did.
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