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#1 of Old 05-08-2008, 07:58 PM - Thead Starter
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I am trying to help plan a shower for a friend who is planning to adopt. The baby will be born in August. I told her she should go and register, but she's been a little resistant because she doesn't feel like it's appropriate to register if you're adopting.

I think it's fine, and I know lots of people who have registered when they adopted. I also know of tons of people who will want to participate in the shower. What's your opinion on this? Should she go and register?
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#2 of Old 05-08-2008, 08:04 PM
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i think it is ok to register, however i can imagine her hesitance. what if things fall through? unlikely but it happens then she is stuck with stuff for the baby that 'could have been'

on the other hand, i have never known anyone that registered for a baby, only weddings
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#3 of Old 05-08-2008, 09:09 PM
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I think it would be ok for her to register but I guess if I were in her shoes I would register after the adoption is officially successful and have the shower after she has the baby. I agree with Andrea...that if she has a baby shower and then something happens and it falls through she would be devastated.
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#4 of Old 05-08-2008, 09:58 PM
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When we adopted the boys, I didn't register, mainly because we only had 3 weeks notice before they were born. However, the teachers I worked with threw us a shower when we got back that was just diapers, wipes, and formula. I had such an overflow, I didn't buy diapers for 4 months! What was great about it was that they waited til we got home and then the registry wasn't necessary, it was just the things mentioned.

Baby showers aren't pregnancy showers, they're to welcome the baby, no matter how they came into your family.
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#5 of Old 05-09-2008, 11:47 AM
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I personally would feel more comfortable if things happened the way the did for Dana.
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#6 of Old 05-09-2008, 03:12 PM
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I agree wit Dana tat a shower after the baby is a good idea. Mine was after Alyssa was born.
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#7 of Old 05-09-2008, 03:30 PM
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I can understand both sides. On the one hand, a new baby requires a lot of stuff. On the other hand, sadly, it may fall through. Waiting may be the best option for now. I would definitely throw her a shower once the baby arrives. I'm not a big fan of wedding showers, but baby showers sure help out a lot! What a kind friend you are to do this for her!
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#8 of Old 05-09-2008, 04:04 PM
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A new child, I would say a shower would be fine.
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#9 of Old 05-09-2008, 04:20 PM
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It's no different than throwing a shower and, God forbid, the mom-to-be miscarries.

I personally, esp now that return policies are sh!tty, that getting what I asked for/needed would be a heck of a lot better than a bunch of stuff I don't.
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#10 of Old 05-10-2008, 02:32 AM
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Another thing for imput is i still just don't get having the shower before the baby arrives! the whole point of the shower is to let everyone oogle over the baby and for the mom to have some actual hands free time and be doted on.

just the crazy canuck in me though
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#11 of Old 05-11-2008, 02:14 AM
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I see no reason why adopting is any different that actually giving birth! The shower is to celebrate the impending arrival of a new baby. No matter how the baby is coming, the birth should still be celebrated. And if she would normally register, then that is what she should do now. But I would ask her if she would prefer to wait until the baby has arrived, just in case. She might be more comfortable with that,

~*~Brenda~*~
mom to Drew (16) High School At Last!
mom to Ally (10) 4th Grade, Baby! WooHoo!

Parenthood:  That state of being better chaperoned than you were before marriage.  ~Marcelene Cox  Sing out loud in the car even, or especially, if it embarrasses your children.  ~Marilyn Penland
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