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Hypothetical question...

post #1 of 17
9/23/04 at 10:44am
Thread Starter 
If, god forbid, you would ever pass away...would you want DH to remarry? Would you want your kids to call the new wife "mom"?


Adam and I were talking about it the other day and yes I would want him to remarry. I want him to be happy. And while I don't want Tori forced to call her mom, I hope Tori would start calling her that on her own, because that would mean she is being taken care of and feels comfortable with whoever it may be.


Yeah I know, it sounds retarded and I hope it's never an issue, but I was just wondering.
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post #2 of 17
9/23/04 at 10:49am
With my health problems DH and I have talked about this a few times.
I would want him to remarry but I told him he has a 2 yr required mourning period before he can even start dating or having sex.
I don't think I would mind if my kids called her mom as long as they were allowed to remember and talk about me also. Of course, I wouldn't want them to be told to call her mom... I would want them to do it because she feels like a mom to them.
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post #3 of 17
9/23/04 at 10:50am
I would hope Randy would get married because he could never handle it on his own.

I would hope the woman is special enough that the kids would feel comfortable enough to call them mom.
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post #4 of 17
9/23/04 at 10:50am
yes I would want him to remarry, and if my children felt comfortable calling her mom, then that would be ok with me, but I don't want them forced and I want them to remember me, so they can't take down all the photos of me.
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post #5 of 17
9/23/04 at 12:46pm
I would definately want Eric to remarry and would be fine with Jen calling her mommy. I would want someone to fill that void in Jen's life without me there. I trust in the fact that when she is old enough to understand, Eric would make sure she knows who I was and make me a major part of her life.
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post #6 of 17
9/23/04 at 12:48pm
I'd want Matt to be happy- but not TOO soon after I've gone away.

I'm gonna greedy too and I don't want my children calling anyone else mom.. but ME..
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post #7 of 17
9/23/04 at 12:55pm
I do NOT want my children EVER calling someone else Mom. That name is reserved for me and only me. I would hope if Billy remarried (which I hope he would so he wouldn't live out his life being lonely) that my kids would love her and be close to her, but I would NEVER want them to call her mom.
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post #8 of 17
9/23/04 at 1:11pm
No, I woudnt want them to call her mom. I was their one and only mother. I know Rich would not allow them to do that either.

Rich and I talked about it before and would definitley want the other to move on with their life if that means remarrying some day.
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post #9 of 17
9/23/04 at 1:59pm
Since I'd be dead and gone .. that would be their decision and not mine.
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post #10 of 17
9/23/04 at 4:35pm
I would have to say yes I would want him to remarry and if DD wanted to call her mom then that would be fine with me. My biggest fear is him moving and my parents or sisters not being able to see her as much as they do now.
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post #11 of 17
9/23/04 at 4:37pm
No I don't want him to remayry and no i dont want my kids calling any body else mom! Im selfish, my family is mine, Even if I croke!
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post #12 of 17
9/23/04 at 4:56pm
Well, If I were dead and in the ground, I don't think it would really matter what I thought. BUT....

I wouldn't want DH to remarry, but if he found someone that was good to him and to Jonathan (or whatever future children we might have) then it would probably be good for him. But I wouldn't want to be forgotten and treated as if I had neer existed. I would want him to find someone that could appreciate that. I wouldn't want my kids calling someone else Mom or Mommy (unless they're adults and want to call their MIL that). I wouldn't have a problem with them having another special name for her, though. I would want my DH and kids to have a good enough relationship with my family that they would involve them in their lives, as well, even if I weren't around.
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post #13 of 17
9/23/04 at 6:48pm
Yes I would want my DH to remarry and be happy, he deserves that with all the he!! I have put him through. To call another person Mom. Since Alisha is older, I know she would not. I would not want her to either. Mama whatever(name) is fine.
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post #14 of 17
9/23/04 at 6:55pm
DH and I have talked about it. (Especially since his DS died last year at 29 years old of cancer)

I would want him to remarry and I hope he would remarry someone who the kids would feel was their new mother and could comfortably call mom.
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post #15 of 17
9/23/04 at 8:11pm
I would want him to remarry but only if she is the right person and loves my kids like her own. We know too many kids who have step-parents who act like they don't exist and I wouldn't want that. Not that I am giving step-parents a bad rap, these people are extremely selfish, unloving people .... I don't know if I would want them to call her mommy/mom though, that is me!
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post #16 of 17
9/26/04 at 10:19pm
I would want him to remarry but definately be sure he was marrying the right person for the kids to have as a step mom. I would hope the kids didn't call her mommy.
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post #17 of 17
9/26/04 at 11:01pm
I've thought about it too, Elaine. I would want both of them to be happy.
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