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This is why people think all women should be a size ZERO! - Page 2

post #31 of 67
5/18/05 at 4:56pm
Sometimes it doesn't matter HOW much help you get.

One of my best friends went through this from the time she was in 8th grade til she graduated. By the time a friend and myself convinced her to get help she couldn't not put food in her mouth without throwing up and she WASN'T making herself throw up. Her body just reacted that way for the longest time.

Dawn is totally right, we don't look at depressed people and say how much they disgust us.
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post #32 of 67
5/18/05 at 5:38pm
I include me when I say this, but women are just catty. We go to the mall and when we see a woman whose fatter than we are, we feel a little bit better about ourselves. We call fat women "cows". If you see your husband's ex girlfriend and she's gained a lot of weight and you're looking good, you feel like you're better than she is even if she just got back from caring for starving children in India and won and the Nobel Peace Prize. it's the same in every culture I've come in contact with. I'm not sure why it's just human nature. Pretty women are just more valued than less attractive women. Until we look at each other as human beings first and attractiveness second, then it's always going to be this way.

I have a sister in the super skinny catagory and a mother in the super fat. So I've seen both sides and believe me, people say really fat women are disgusting too. Really what makes one person better than another just because that person is more attractive?

I admit, I'm like every other woman. When I heard my old high school rivial had grey hair and was wearing it in a 1960s style beehive - I got a certain satisfaction out of that. And she may be the sweetest person in the world even though she has way out of style hair.
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post #33 of 67
5/18/05 at 6:04pm
Thread Starter 
I really didn't want this to be a debate.. I was just stating something.

Anyway..

I was meaning that whole post about women looking healhy.. not super super skinny.. and not hugly obese.

God knows that i'm not skinny.. i'm not morbidly obese either.

I'm a big girl.. I just wish society would get a 'healthier' view of women. Not the impossible.
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post #34 of 67
5/18/05 at 6:10pm
I can't stay quiet Here I go:

A good part of the reason is that stuff like this is shoved in all of our faces and we accept it as the standards. And nothing is done to change it.

Do you realize that when it comes to clothing shoots that half the time they have to pin the clothing on the models because it doesn't fit right?

Do you realize that Gwen Stefani and Nicole Kidman are starving themselves because they are now spokesmodels for companys ?

This bothers me, as a woman who, even if I am a tad bit over weigth, still fall below the average size in this country!! That's a shocker right there!

We put up with this, a lot of the time, but giving out money for toys, movies etc... We need to turn away from the media images and the Barbie stereo types and present what is healthy for the children in our lives.

We need to go about finding a way to change the stereotype. Encourage Hollywood to change it, encourage actresses to buck the trend. Because healthy isn't scrawny. Healthy is healthy. And we want that broadcasted acroass the board, not just by our athletes, but by all people in the spotlight, and anyone the children in our lives could be looking up to, including ourselves.

off.

Now it's time for me to go home and get ready to go and wait in line for Start Wars Let's see what I see there....
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post #35 of 67
5/18/05 at 6:13pm
Quote:
Originally posted by spideybabe
This bothers me, as a woman who, even if I am a tad bit over weigth, still fall below the average size in this country!! That's a shocker right there!!!
Part of mine didn't copy from MS Word..., In between country and that's, it should say...I"ve been called fat by some people....that's the shocker@@@

*grumbles* Heading home now!
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post #36 of 67
5/18/05 at 6:23pm
Nikki--Where in the world is there fat on you? I think you look fabulous!
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post #37 of 67
5/18/05 at 8:30pm
I've had people make nasty comments about my blubber and how I managed to get a good looking husband. to them. I obviously know something they don't know. We just need to focus on the things that are really important. I'm sure when we get to the pearlly gates St. Peter won't be saying "Get your ugly a$$ to the back of the line! You don't belong here."

More than half of looking good is knowing how to put yourself together - especially as you get older. These girls are held up as role models to younger girls and if they want to do that, then they need to stop doing drugs and take better care of themselves. If they don't want to change their ways (since this is the crowd they pander to), then they'll just be another drop in the pan drugged out Hollywood party girl.
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post #38 of 67
5/18/05 at 9:18pm
Geez Robyn, look what ya did...
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post #39 of 67
5/18/05 at 9:28pm
absolutely horrible looking picture

i think it has been adjusted alot!

but i agree, i don't like seeing people's bones... nice and toned is my dream... athletic looking, not sick looking
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post #40 of 67
5/18/05 at 9:30pm
Is that REALLY Lindsey Lohan?? I would have NEVER have recognized her.
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post #41 of 67
5/19/05 at 7:41am
Quote:
Originally posted by Grace
I'm sure when we get to the pearlly gates St. Peter won't be saying "Get your ugly a$$ to the back of the line! You don't belong here."
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post #42 of 67
5/19/05 at 9:01am
Ok, I have an eating disorder.
I can show some pics of me looking much skinnier than them.
The problem is that I preffer being skinny because to wear the kind of clothes I like I HAVE to be skinny to fit into them.
I feel much more comfortable being slim.
Here's where the problem starts; Some people like me can become VERY overweight by just looking at food.
Once I start loosing weight and get on a roll, I get to scared that I'm going to put it back on if I stop dieting, so even when I'm skin and bone like the girls
on this photo, I'm still dieting.
If you had a choice of looking obese or anoerxic which would you choose?
I'm sure they both realise they are too thin but would rather be called skinny *****es than fat cows.
I know I'd rather be called a skinny *****.
I'll also add, when I am at that undernourished faze, my brain is also skinny and I turn into a pompus judgmental twig and anyone with a figure is a fat cow.

If you going to choose to be famous, then you have to realise that no matter what your body is like people are going to judge.
If they had perfect figures we'd be saying, oh they must have had surgery or They should get a life, there's more to life than working out!


In our world of judgmental *****ing, there's no way any of us can win so stuff it, I'll have my burger with cheese
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post #43 of 67
5/19/05 at 4:47pm
I don't think it is healthy when women obsess about their weight. I've been overweight since I was very young and I can tell you that I had people in junior high make fun of me. I only had a couple of friends then. The rest were scum (no matter how pretty they were...because if you are pretty and make fun of other people who aren't as pretty by society's standards, then to me you are just an ugly person and have an ugly personality).

I found out who my true friends were...the ones that liked me for who I was. Who needs butt ugly skinny when you have friends like that?
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post #44 of 67
5/19/05 at 4:57pm
I just don't get it though ... all these comments about people being overweight and how cruel others are about it. How is that different from being underweight and talking about how gross these girls look?
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post #45 of 67
5/19/05 at 5:07pm
I think society just needs to get a grip and stop pressuring people...women in particular...to try to look too skinny. Beauty is skin deep. After 25-30 years of being overweight, I truly believe in that.
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post #46 of 67
5/19/05 at 5:12pm
After 10 years of being overweight (NOT counting my childhood), I think society needs to get a grip and teach men and women how to live healthy lives. Not too thin, and not overweight to the point of causing health problems.

An interesting note .... most insurance companies will cover eating disorders, but not weight loss treatments. Now that doesn't seem right ...
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post #47 of 67
5/19/05 at 5:14pm
Good point, Dawn.
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post #48 of 67
5/19/05 at 7:15pm
Dawn you have made excellent points about why it's ok to comment on yucky skinny girls, but not okay to comment on overweight people. I guess we shouldn't do either... But I am not that good of a person.

I was a very heavy child, lost the weight in college and I continue to struggle to keep it off. But I also know that I want to be healthy so I will be here for grandbabies and all that good stuff!
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post #49 of 67
5/19/05 at 9:06pm
It's no different, Dawn. Neither is very nice. I think as women get older and out of the "Babe" racket, it matters less. Well, not for Hollywood actresses, but for the rest of us - including female politicians. By the time we reach 40, it just matters a whole lot less. At least for me it does. I know I'm not the hottest thing out there with the most stylish clothes, and that's okay.

Before we can become okay with others, we have to accept ourselves.
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post #50 of 67
5/19/05 at 9:07pm
Dawn, I consider being morbidly obese an eating disorder.
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post #51 of 67
5/19/05 at 11:10pm
I agree Grace .. and that's why I'm ticked that there is no help out there. I researched all these diet centers and what not ... let's see, how does $3500 to lose 60 pounds sound? It's cheaper to stay fat! And that didn't include my food! Oh ... but I could FINANCE it!

I think one day soon, insurance companies will be forced to cover weight loss assistance. Wouldn't it be far cheaper to do that than pay for insulin, kidney transplants, triple heart bypasses, blown knees, hip replacement, etc, etc, etc???

It'll end up like birth control ONE day. I still remember being pissed off that insurance would pay for abortions, but not the stupid pill! Shows you how old I really am!

And for the record, I've been on both sides of the scale (literally again). I was 95 lbs dripping wet in high school and had shrinks threatening to send me to rehab if I didn't start eating. If I ate more than two or three bites of something, I'd get sick to my stomach. Then I was a healthy weight for a few years, and then, most recently, obese. I've just decided that it's not my place to sit back and analyze other people and their appearance. Whatever their weight, it is their responsibility to do something about it. I have found that I am FAR happier with my own personal life since I quit giving a flip how much so-and-so has lost or gained and concentrate on making myself as healthy as I can.

Stepping off my
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post #52 of 67
5/20/05 at 1:31am
You are so right, Dawn. My mother was on about a half a dozen weight related medications when I last spoke to her. She's about 200-300 lbs overweight. She really needs impatient mental health care. If she was 85 lbs, then she could get the treatment she needs. I think she needs mental help not just having her stomach stappled.

Insurance pays for her medications, but not for her to get impatient mental health care for her over eating disorder.
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post #53 of 67
5/20/05 at 4:57am
Quote:
Originally posted by Dawn
I just don't get it though ... all these comments about people being overweight and how cruel others are about it. How is that different from being underweight and talking about how gross these girls look?


From someone who has been at both ends of the scale, the truth is that most underweight people choose to be that way so it hurts less for them to be called skinny b*tches, (infact most of them take it as a complement deep down.) Overweight people generaly DON'T choose to be that way and are usually down in the dumps about it, so to be insulted over their weight hurts them much much more.
I'm not saying that it's ok to insult ANYONE, I'm just saying it's much less hurtfull to a skinny person than an obese person.
It the same difference as being insulted by blonde jokes if you're a natural blonde than if you're a bottle blonde. One has chosen to be blonde the other has no choice (unless they dye their hair, but they still get insulted cause they know what they are naturaly).

sorry, I think I just confused myself too
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post #54 of 67
5/20/05 at 5:02am
There are groups for overweight people just as there are groups for underweight people. There's help for both!

I have an eating disorder and I am currently obese, I have counselling and help for this as much as when I'm underweight.
I usually find that I'm happier being underweight so I don't look for help. I always LOOK for help when I'm obese.
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post #55 of 67
5/20/05 at 7:58am
There may be groups for overweight people, but there is not the same kind of nutrition and workout options availalbe as to someone that is anorexic, at least not here in the states.

I checked into it ... my insurance doesn't cover a nutritionist (and since diet is 80% of what matters) unless I am diabetic or anorexic. Insurance doesn't even help cover the costs of gym membership so that I can get the suggest 30 - 60 mins of exercise per day.

That seems foolish considering a few months to a year of both of those and I'd no longer be overweight. Beats a lifetime of ailments in comparison! I wonder how one would go about trying to get these things covered???? Lenora??? Any suggestions?
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post #56 of 67
5/20/05 at 10:59am
But (and boy am I gonna get it for this) do you NEED a gym to lose weight? When I lost my biggest amount, I worked out at home. I walked and did tapes and then finally started jogging. I never stepped foot into a gym until much later. Partly because the last place I wanted to be seen jiggling was a gym with pretty skinny half naked people.

Excluding people with health issues, I think weight can be lost. It is a personal decision, a VERY difficult one, but a choice. I am not talking about medical issues that hamper weight loss. ***ducking now***
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post #57 of 67
5/20/05 at 1:00pm
There's not impatient mental health care for morbdly obese people. There's fat farms, but they are very expensive and private. Maybe if you're Oprah you can afford that...

I'm not sure how much the cholestrol reducing drugs she takes cost. I imagine quite a bit. For her, it's a mental issue. Maybe it is a bit for me too. I have seen her cry and dig into the food - and we're not talking carrots here. I did that for awhile which is how I got this big.

It's not just a matter of willpower. It's a matter of retraining the mind and the body. It is finding new ways of coping so we can put down the ice cream.

You can't just stop eating and expect to loose. You have to be trained to loose weight. Because if you're not careful, you'll put your body in starvation mode and then you'll just gain even though you are barely eating. It's a vicious cycle whether you are too thin or too fat.

It's way past time for the medical profession and the insurance companies to quit thinking about weight as a matter of willpower and start seeing it as a disease. Because it causes disease. In the end, it would save them tons of money on all kinds of treatments and medications.

Our insurance system is messed up.
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post #58 of 67
5/20/05 at 1:04pm
I work out at home, too, Dana. It's not that being big is the problem, its money and coordination. I could go to a women's gym where I would fit in fat wise, but I would still not be coordinated and I get embarassed stumbling around all over the place.

For people who have never worked out, they really need the extra help learning how to exercise their bodies without injuring themselves or overdoing to the point they hate it and refuse to do it anymore.
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post #59 of 67
5/20/05 at 1:15pm
I think it's partially shock factor. Everybody's know Kristie Alley's big for a long time. The first time I saw her at her present size, I did think "OMG! Kristie's really let herself go! She used to be so pretty."

We're used to seeing Lindsay looking healthy and cute and being the ultimate young woman. We're not used to her looking the way she does and taking drugs.

Also, I don't want my daughter thinking looking like that is a good thing.

If Lindsay starts eating again, or turns the other way, she'll ballon, because she's put her body in starvation mode. She really, really needs help and she has the money for it.
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post #60 of 67
5/20/05 at 1:29pm
I so agree with you, Grace. For so many it's more than just saying "okay I'm not gonna have that pie for dessert". They have issues that cause them to overeat and that's what they need help for. Plus help learning how to lose weight the correct way. Sure a lot of people can go to the library and get books on how to eat and exercise right, rent videos to help and it works, but then there's others that need a little more help and guidance.

We all know obesity is an epidemic in our country so I just can't understand why insurance companies don't want to help people lose weight. I'm sure they're paying out a lot more for people with joint problems, heart problems, diabetes, etc. caused by being overweight than they would on programs to help them lose the weight.
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