My mom

As most of you know, my mom is in remission from Stage IV oral cancer--that's the final stage. She was diagnosed and began treatment back in April 2004. Normally with cancer, you have one primary spot, but she had two. One spot went from her left tonsil into her soft palate. The other spot was on the top of her larynx. At that time, her prognosis was not good. I was told point blank that she had only months to live. So, the fact that she lived and has been in remission for a year now is a miracle from God, no doubt.
She had a CT scan two weeks ago and went today to get the results. They found an abnormal spot on her throat. So, she has to go have a PET Scan. The doctor's office is going to set it up and call her with the date and time.
She seems to think it's nothing, no big deal. Here's why:
Last year, when she finished chemo and radiation, she had to have a CT scan done, and her ENT saw a spot on her throat that looked abnormal. So, she had a PET Scan done (PET Scans, in VERY BASIC terms, show cancer) and it showed nothing. They decided it must have been an infection because she was having lots of sinus infections, etc at that point.
Well, so now she thinks it's the same thing again. I am not so optimistic. I know for certain that medicine is not an exact science, and that the spot that was thought to be an infection may have been cancerous. So, now I wonder if it has spread or grown.
I am ready for it: she's still smoking and drinking and doing the very things that brought the cancer on in the first place. I don't claim to know it all, but I know for certain you can't expect a different result if your behavior remains the same.
Her hands and feet are blue, she's not eating well.
When she was first diagnosed, I read all the info about cancer the doctors gave me, and one of the signs of advanced stages of cancer is discoloration/blue coloring of the extemeties.
So, we'll see what the PET Scan says. I am going with her to get the results this time. Last time I was out of town. I will not accept a flippant explanation of the mass this go around.

I know Becca. I think my mom is just a weak person and will never change. Even while going through her treatments, she continued to smoke. She didn't drink then, but she also had unlimited access to percocet and xanax and attivan, so she could get her fix in a different way.
It's hard to feel too much sympathy for her, but I don't want her to suffer, either. It's frustrating, knowing all she went through, all everyone went through, and to see her repeat the same behavior--

No, I think it is because she is sick. It was like that when she was diagnosed, I remember the dr looking and her hands and feet and shaking his head. Then it got better during treatment and he would look at her hands and feet at every check up and every week prior to her chemo. It was better for a while, but now it's back. If it hadn't gotten better for a while, I would think it was due to another condition.

Brenda, I cannot even imagine having had cancer once, much less twice. WOW! I am amazed and in awe and my hat is off to you.
The question about her attitude has been posed to me before, and honestly, I just think she is in denial. She isn't tough, she's not a person who would think, "I am gonna beat cancer" or "I am gonna live my life my way." I wish she had that kind of guts. But in reality, I think she just thinks it won't happen again.
I don't know about the other possibilities for the blue hands and feet. It's really gross to see, they are truly blue. She had labs done on her blood and they tested her liver--did a liver scan. So, I don't know. I was thinking her doctors would see that her hands are blue, and if they thought it was something besides the cancer they would address it.
I will go with her when she gets the PET Scan results, so I am going to ask about the hands. Of course, my mom will argue with me, and say that her hands always look like that, it's normal for her, etc, but it's not. That's also frustrating!