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Advice for MILs

post #1 of 7
11/17/05 at 4:01pm
Thread Starter 
What advice would you give a woman about to embark on MILhood?
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post #2 of 7
11/17/05 at 4:08pm
Thread Starter 
For me:

* Respect your DIL as your son's choice for his life mate and the mother of his children.

* Do not give advice unless asked for it.

* Stay out of your children's lives. Whatever you do, do not try to break your son up with his wife. This will only cause animosity and may lead to you being shut out of the picture not the wife.

* Even if you hate, loathe and despise the DIL, be pleasant to her. Don't bad mouth her to your son or other family members except perhaps your dh and that's what he's there for, to listen to your woes. Maybe join a MIL site and whinge to your friends there. I am trying to do this with my SIL and BIL that I despise and let me tell you it's not easy.

* Enjoy. Maybe you'll get lucky and your DIL is someone you can actually like and be a daughter to you.
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post #3 of 7
11/17/05 at 4:15pm
*remember you are someone's DIL too. Don't do anything that you wouldn't want your own MIL to do.

*Treat them like adults

*Know that your son picked her and respect his decision

*Don't talk about her behind her back, it will get back to her sooner or later
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post #4 of 7
11/21/05 at 11:16am
Quote:
remember you are someone's DIL too. Don't do anything that you wouldn't want your own MIL to do.
GREAT ADVICE!
I also agree with what Lenora said about respecting your DIL and enjoying her.

Be nice.
Realize that your DIL doesn't control your dear son. If she had the power to control people, she would probably use that power to control someone a lot more influential and important.
BE NICE.
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post #5 of 7
11/25/05 at 6:47pm
I agree with all the sayings.
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post #6 of 7
11/25/05 at 9:37pm
I agree with everything above, but the one advice I would give is keep your nose out of your kids business
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post #7 of 7
11/26/05 at 8:17pm
I'm going to have to be sure and keep refering back to this thread Greg and his girlfriend are planning to marry next year so I will be a MIL (and a Grandmother, she has a little boy (Kaia) who has just turned 4.).

I have not met her but she is making Greg happy so that is what is important. Her family like Greg so that is good.

Her birthday is the same as the twins but she is 7.5 years older than Greg, I know Greg is mature for his age in a lot of ways but he is still only 20, that causes me some concerns but lets face it if he way 29 and going to marry a 20 year old I would still be concerned but probably not so much.

But it is his decision so I will just go with the flow and hope I like her when I meet her, probably at Greg's 21st in October if they don't get married sooner, I get the impression they are going to wait a while because they want to save up and have a nice wedding.
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