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Directives for the birth

post #1 of 7
Thread Starter 
Due to the MS, I will have to have a general anesthic instead of an epidural. It was quite awhile before I was able to hold my dd, when she was born due to the lasting effects of the drugs. It still breaks my heart that of all the people around when my dd was born, I was the last person to hold my dd. This time I may have to have my inlaws up to take care of Kate. I do not want to be last again - especially after the inlaws. I am the mother. I carried this baby for nine months, I shouldn't be the last person in the room to hold it. And I will be if the inlaws are here. I wish there was some way to leave them out of it, but what will we do with Kate? It's not like I know anyone I can reliably leave her with for the day. Is there any way I can put in a directive that states I get to hold the baby before the inlaws?
post #2 of 7
I hope you get to hold her/him first.

With Alyssa my dad refused to hold her til I/we had a chance.
post #3 of 7
Thread Starter 
It's just that my SIL is quite the controlling and she will ruin it for me. I know her. Everytime I see her is miserable. I talked to dh about it. If nothing else, we will look into daycare for Kate for the day until things have calmed down. I really don't want her to see me all drugged up like that. It might scare her. Also, the first few hours with a c-section baby aren't all that pleasant. Dd threw up for the better part of the day. I hope she'll be able to spend the day with other kids playing and having fun. Maybe that will take the edge off becoming a big sister.
post #4 of 7
You can state that no one other than yourself or the father is to hold your baby. They have to abide by that.
post #5 of 7
i hope that you figure out something.
post #6 of 7
I'm sorry your in laws don't have enough respect to take a step back and let you hold your own baby first. I'm sure you could make a birth plan and be sure to include that NO ONE is to hold your baby but your or the father of your baby unless you give express consent for them to do so. They can't get that consent if you are all drugged up and don't know what exactly is going on. If your in laws can't understand that you would like to hold your baby before others, TOUGH COOKIES for them. I wish you lots of luck hun, and I hope things work out.
post #7 of 7

Re: Directives for the birth

Advance Directives are important because they let the hospital know what you want or do not want done in the event you are unable to say so yourself. I have one from years and years ago that I had to fill out.
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