Need your help, gals

No, I wish I knew. Brandon is doing the same thing. I'll tell him stomping and throwing won't get you your way, so he tells me he is going to keep doing it until he gets what he wants. I tell him to go for it. It is very annoying!!

nope- Alyssa is doing it too.

Thankfully my six-year-old doesn't do this but it is the "norm" for my three-year-old. It is very annoying and I have no idea what to do to get them to stop.

At 6 yrs old he can understand that he is not allowed to back talk, and whine to try to get his way. I would warn him ONCE and if he kept on try your highest punishment.

My kids don't have the nerve to talk back to me. I got the idea from this board, if mine talk back they get a warning(and I don't give once a day warnings, only once) and the next step is hot cayenne pepper on their tounge. Works great.

We did jalepeno pepper sauce when hannah used to sas us but it doesnt work with Will we are having the same problem. we have tried spankings talking to him about feelings next is hot sauce with him

Emily does this, too.

I need to start instituting that. Both boys are out of control with their blatant talking back and not listening. I am so sick of it. We use the wooden spoon, but it is not working. Now I bet the hot sauce would work, since Brandon hates spicy!

jacob does this... moreso when dh is home!! He knows that mommy doesn't give in, but daddy gets tired of hearing it and usually does!! I usually just ignore him , make him go to his room, or something like that.. he eventually quits. When dh is home it's more of a problem though!!

I think it sounds more cruel than it is. Lots of people believe in soap for backtalk, the way I see it atleast hot pepper/sauce was meant to be eaten(I'm not saying I'm against soap it's just not for me). Hopefully you won't have to do it more than a couple of times before he gets the point. It's better than having a child that gets out of control, because if you give them an inch they will eventually take a mile. I think the younger you fix it the better chance you have of them not becoming one of those out of control teens that mouth off at their parents all the time.

Tara, do you use the pepper flakes or something like Tabasco?

I use dry cayenne pepper usually.

What can the school say? Not like it's abuse or anything. They don't have to like how you discipline but they are your kids. If he told at school I would definitely consider that disrespect and there would be some sort of punsihment for that. If the teacher had anything to say I would quickly remind her of her role as teacher, not parent. My kids have never told at school, but I'm not worried about it.

i am going to have to remember that one. i can't stand kids and people that talk back.

i wouldn't worry about school either. it isn't abuse it is a punishment, i don't think kids brag about time outs or how many time they get sent to their rooms... not until they are teenagers anyhow lol

Haley is only 4 so her day might be coming, but she doesn't normally throw a fit over me saying no to her. I usually get a sad face and an "Okay Momma" from her. But we also have a sit down talk when she does get upset where she tells me her feelings and I tell her mine. I explain that she needs her good vitamins first before she eats any junk so she can be at her strongest and healthiest. We use this for any argument that comes up and she responds very well to it. I hope you find something that works for you.

My boys LOVE to stomp up the steps until I remind them of the punishment. ( Got this from my mother in law and watching her with my teenage nephew). If they stomp up the steps, they have to go up and down them five times. It has only taken maybe three times and they have pretty much stopped it. I do the same thing when they walk away from me stomping or stallking. They have to come back and walk to wherever they were going and back 5 times. As far as talking back goes... I think I might be pretty different here. They MUST watch how they say what they say, but I teach my kids they have a right to be mad at me. But they do not have the right to disrespect me. I don't want kids who just do every single thing they're told without question, every single time. If they want to know why.. I will tell them. If they want to bargain about it.. ie.. Mommy can I do it in five minutes after my show goes off. Or ... Mom I did it last time, can Logan do it this time. Etc. We can talk about it. Or I will give them a choice, you can either do what I tell you or, you can get spanked LOL. Or, Don't make me tell you again, because if I do, you are off the computer for three days, or.... ok, no one.. NO ONE gets to go spend the night with Nana and Paw. That one works really really well.
and I even do that for Ian who is 4. You just have to find what works for you. I also don't make my kids say yes maam and no maam or sir to me and George unless we are upset with them. They do however have to say it to other people.

Joey has really gotten big on attitude lately. We had two ideas - one was an "attitude jar", where every time he cops the attitude, he has to put money in it. Second was a box we keep in the garage - any attitude, and he has to pick one of his toys and put it in the box (he doesn't know what is going to happen to these toys in the future).

I like your approach, Shona. My DH is a big one for the yes ma'am and no ma'am stuff. It's not a biggie to me as long as she says Yes or No, not uh huh and un uh. I do like it when she says yes ma'am to others, though. I agree with you in that there has to be a consequence for not acting right or for not doing what you tell them to, and I also agree that they have to be free to talk to you about things.

I think Eva's DH has a good point. Look at everything LuAnn has gone through with the school; in some cases it doesn't take much to get them on your back, and then they pick at every little thing. And you know, from my experience as a teacher, a lot of kids just talk and don't necessarily "tell" things in a tattling way. For example, a kid might sass the teacher, and another kid might say, "My mom puts hot sauce/hot pepper on my tongue when I talk to her like that!" In that instance, you really couldn't get mad at your kid because it wasn't like he ran to the teacher crying "woe is me" or anything. I would just use caution. No it's not abuse, but it could get them on your case. Personally, as a teacher, that would not send up a red flag for me, and I wouldn't think anything of it, but different people react different ways. Some people interpret spanking as abuse. (Not me, but y'all know what I mean)

I think it's a good point, but I guess I don't worry about if someone else doesn't like what I do. If the school thinks I abuse my kids(or thinks it's not right) and calls CPS so be it, I have nothing to hide. I won't fear what they think.