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Rude comments about your name choice

post #1 of 21
11/8/06 at 5:23pm
Thread Starter 
My sister was a bit rude yesterday when I told her what we were naming the baby and then proceeds to give me a list of names she thought were better. That's about par for the course with her. The only comments that really rubbed me the wrong way where:

When I told her the baby's name was Cara, she said "That's Italian" in a snotty way. So? Dh lived in Italy for three years. He loves Italy. I love Italy. Is there something wrong with being Italian or having an Italian name? Besides, it's a very old name that is used in many countries not just Italy. Even if it was just Italian, Italy is a beautiful country with a beautiful language. I don't see anything wrong with giving our baby an Italian name even if we're not Italian.

Then she critized me for not naming the baby after a member of our family. The Manson family? The family I've barely spoken to for 20 years and can't stand? That is the family I'm supposed to name my baby after? After a bunch of lunatics I don't like and can't stand to be in the same room with? Right.

Has anyone else had this problem? What do you say when someone says something stupid to you like "That's Italian"? I just told her it was a very old name used in many countries especially Ireland (and dh and I are both Irish ) and that dh lived in Italy which he loved.

I didn't expect any better from her so I was just annoyed not hurt.
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post #2 of 21
11/8/06 at 5:27pm
With Brittany I wanted to name her Rebecca Lynn... Well SIL was pg at the same time. She made this big stink that it was her name. Well neither of us used it and she still nudges me for it.

People need to mind their own business.

People told me FLAT out. I dont like that name Trey. I will be calling him Randy. :shocked: I was like excuse me, but this is my request. We already have a Randy in the family, in fact we have two. People need to mind their own business.

Just tell her that this is her name and we are happy. She dont like it TOO BAD hey?
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post #3 of 21
11/8/06 at 5:29pm
My mom told me how much she hated the name Gabriel. She's told me that she's going to call him "skip". I told her that's the beauty of this, my kid my name She told us she wasn't going to buy anything for him because she didn't like the name too...I asked her if that meant love equaled money.
I think the name has finally grown on her or she has learned that it really is the name we're picking so she's shut up about it.


We also had a friend seem surprised that we picked such a "religious" name. Obviously this friend doesn't know Mike very well. We didn't excatly pick it because it's religious but I do like that it is.
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post #4 of 21
11/8/06 at 5:31pm
Thread Starter 
I think my tone was pretty much "like I care what you think". But making what I felt was a bit of racist comment about Italians kind of bothered me. Not that I didn't know that about her or my family. Their sevre racism is one of the many reasons I don't like my family.
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post #5 of 21
11/8/06 at 5:45pm
I can't think of anyone who has made a bad comment.

My mom is notorious when I suggest something - instead of saying no I don't like it she comes up wiht a whole nother list of names for me.
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post #6 of 21
11/8/06 at 6:47pm
Cara is a beautiful name. Your sister needs to get over it. Thankfully I've not gotten too many comments about our name choices. I know that one of my grandmothers doesn't like any of the names of her great-grandchildren. They sound too old fashioned to her, but guess what? Old is new again. My sister's middle child is named Isaac. My grandmother said "Yuck!" I'm going to call him Ike. Talk about yuck.
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post #7 of 21
11/8/06 at 11:40pm
Quote:
Then she critized me for not naming the baby after a member of our family. The Manson family?
Tell her sorry, "Squeaky" Fromme was already taken and you didn't want to name the baby after HER (SIL)!

I tell ya.... when some people have a thought, they just SHOULDN'T!! I'd just tell her to shut the "H" up and get bent. But I'm a !!

Just ignore her. You picked the name for YOUR reasons and don't have to explain it to ANYONE. People like her p!$$ me off.
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post #8 of 21
11/9/06 at 1:35am
Thread Starter 
I really have to thank my sister for reminding me why I have nothing to do with those people. It also made me realize that if Cara ever tries to hook up with my family, they will treat her differently than Kate because her name is Italian and obviously they have some hang up about Italians.
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post #9 of 21
11/9/06 at 1:54am
Oh, gee... Doesn't she have kids of her own? She probably named them without consulting you and taking an opinion poll from the entire universe.
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post #10 of 21
11/9/06 at 5:52am
We named our sons Richard and Anthony but called them Ricky and Tony from the minute they were born. Same with Gregory, he has always been called Greg.

My MIL said "we do not like shortened versions of names, we will call them Richard and Anthony" I just looked at her in amazement and said, but you have always called your son Des, not Desmond.

Case closed she has always called them Ricky and Tony. What a fruit loop
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post #11 of 21
11/9/06 at 10:29am
I have had this problem A LOT!! Pretty much every time I mention a name which is part of the reason we STILL do not have a single name picked out. Since we're going to be surprised, we need two names and we don't have long to go.
I will pick a name I absolutely love but then I run it by my mom and Rob and one of them ALWAYS hates it. Then they make fun of it or tell me why they hate it and I can't think of it the same way anymore...it ruins it for me. Why can't people just accept your name and be supportive?
And about the whole Italian thing...so what? My name is French or German (depending on who you ask) and neither of my parents are from those places. There's no rule saying you have to stick with a certain location when it comes to picking out a name you like.
Good for you for ignoring your sister. I hope I can do the same eventually so this poor kiddo of mine will have a name!!
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post #12 of 21
11/9/06 at 10:48am
I know what you mean about someone ruining a name. Mike really liked the name Orion for a boy but my mom ruined it by some sing song thing she would do and I couldn't get it outta my head.
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post #13 of 21
11/9/06 at 11:05am
I'd tell her to mind her own business and not worry about what I was naming my child! My mom was never thrilled with the name Jessica, but Mike and I loved it and that's all that counts!

My latest pet peeve though... when I shorten her name (and this has been the case since she was a baby!) I spell it Jessi. That's it. No "e". But everytime I turn around, my mom or a teacher or somebody else puts that gosh forsaken "e" on the end of it and then just claims that it's easier because that's normal. So .. if I named her Caitlyn, would they have spelled it Katelyn just because it's more common???? I DON'T THINK SO!

Sorry to hijack ... just drives me batty, that's all! So needless to say... I can totally relate!
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post #14 of 21
11/9/06 at 11:35am
My Mom didn't care for two of our children's names: Bailey and Payton but you know what? She came around and now says that she can't imagine them being called anything else.
When Zachary was born I told everyone that I didn't want his name shortened to Zach until HE decided he wanted to go by Zach. That didn't happen until last year but I had a hard time getting the in-laws to understand. When Zachary was small he used to correct them " it's ZachARY!"
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post #15 of 21
11/9/06 at 12:33pm
I don't get it form my immediate family but have heard it A LOT. People call Zachariah, Zachary and when I correct them they say whatever, I call him Zachary. Zachariah even calls himself Zachariah. And I though Noah would be fine. Everyone has heard that name, right? Wrong. I get more strange looks about his name than Zachariah. Go figure.
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post #16 of 21
11/9/06 at 12:37pm
I would have just told her that's nice, but I didn't ask for your opinion, I was stating a fact


I couldn't care less if no one liked my kids' names, they aren't the ones who has to live with being called that

I have a friend named Cara and dh's cousin is Kara, I'd let your sister know that the name Cara is Irish Gaelic and Latin, not Italian by origin.

In the end it comes down to your right to name your baby what you want Heck, name her LaWanda and see what your sister says
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post #17 of 21
11/9/06 at 1:02pm
I didn't really care if anyone liked the names we picked out or not..

and as a side note.. when dh and I decided to name Jacob b/c I love the name ... my only stipulation was that I hate the nickname Jake and won't call him that... I still don't call him that.. it's Jacob.. and I don't like it when most other people call him Jake.. some of dh's friends who are like family use that nickname, but that's it!!
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post #18 of 21
11/9/06 at 2:53pm
OK let's start this post off wiht the fact that my name is SHONA ( Show na) Yeah.. trying living with family that hates that name all your life. I LOVE the name Cara, and it is as much Gaelic/Irish as it is Italian. Though I was fast when I was little to correct anyone who mispronounced my name( Especially my of a GreatGrandmother) NO one liked the name Kyan. Only George and I, but they all love it now. When I was pregnant with Ian, I wanted his middle name to be James, after my father. My mother tod me she didn't think she could love him as much if we did that. Well, I didn't use it, and I've regretted it ever since, so.. whatever we name this kid, his middle name will be James. And no one gets to know that until after the baby is born, ( with the exception of my stepfather just so he won't be hurt)

YOUR KID = YOUR NAME
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post #19 of 21
11/9/06 at 3:33pm
I don't remember anyone saying anything negative about the names we pick out and honestly wouldn't care if they did. It's rude for them to say they think it's ugly or that it doesn't fit with your last name or whatever their excuse is. Maybe you don't like their name or the names of their children but that's why there are so many names in the world . . . so we don't all have the same name. Everyone has their own likes and dislikes and shouldn't be made to feel bad for the name they chose for THEIR child. Tell your sister to shove her opinions.
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post #20 of 21
11/9/06 at 5:16pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Knight
We named our sons Richard and Anthony but called them Ricky and Tony from the minute they were born. Same with Gregory, he has always been called Greg.

My MIL said "we do not like shortened versions of names, we will call them Richard and Anthony" I just looked at her in amazement and said, but you have always called your son Des, not Desmond.

OMG when I was pregnant with Trey I was training my temp and she asked me what my baby's name was going to be. I told her the given name and then what I was going to call him and she chewed me a new A$$ hole about how people make her sick that they shorten the names of the given name. If you wanted the shorter name then you should have just given that name. I was freaked out. I think Trey is lucky because he when he grows up can go by so many different names and he can pick.
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post #21 of 21
11/9/06 at 5:24pm
My sister suggested other names for Travis because she thinks Travis is a redneck name. My basic response to people who have something negative to say about my kids' names is: You name your kids, I'll name mine. When you pass a kid through your loins, then feel free to pick any name you like, but don't criticize my choices!
to all the people who have said negative things about our kids' names!
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