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Please tell me it's not just my daughter

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
Haley (who is 11) has become extemely argumentative... lots of talking back and snotty comments as well. She bosses her brother around and is physically abusive to him. Now he is no angel... he's going through an incredibly whiney stage and I KNOW he does things just to irritate her but no matter how many times I talk to her about the proper way to handle it, she still continues to yell at and hit him.
I have had so many heart to hearts with her and usually walk away thinking "she really understands, and things are going to get better", but they never do. She has a sense of entitlement that I can't figure out where came from and when things don't go her way it's always someone elses' fault and she is so unloved and treated so unfairly. I've really had just about all I can handle and I haven't even hit the teen years.
post #2 of 6
Oh yeah we have that here with Sam who will be 13 in april. I think alot is the age differance and the fact that she babysits him after school. She forgets the power ends when I am around.
post #3 of 6
Thread Starter 
Haley babysits Zach as well and it does seem that she has trouble returning to the "child" role once I am home.
post #4 of 6
I taught 8th grade, and everything you are describing is about right for 11-13 year olds. It varies in intensity, but for the most part, I saw some degree of this in many of my girls that I taught. I don't look forward to this stage with Emily. All I can say is be consistent. Punish her or give her a consequence for her actions even when it seems to make no difference. If you don't give her consequences, then she will think she can do whatever she wants all the time--and essentially, she would have the upper hand--acting however she wants with no consequences--so keep on punishing her even if it seems to have no effect. Kids are great at pretending to be unphased by things, like punishments. It's a battle of the wills, and you have to keep punishing her, tiring as it may be.
post #5 of 6
Well my girls aren't that age yet, but two of my nieces are.... and they act the same way. I am so not wanting the girls to hit this stage.
post #6 of 6
That's me laughing WITH you ... because if I lose my sense of humor, I'm done for! Jessi spends more time grounded and in her room than she does not. I'm really hoping she gets it all out of her system NOW because I don't think we'll both live through her teen years!
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