Haley's Best Friend

Can you offer to wash her clothes for her and Febreeze air freshener works better than anything else I have found. (Not the spray for fabrics, although that works very well also, but the air freshener in a can.)

Oh...Spray lots of febreeze on her stuff when she isn't around so you don't offend her?

I admire you for allowing her to stay with you. I'm sure it's a financial burden to have her there (Food, electricity, and other needs) but you obviously want to help her more than you are concerned about her expenses. You have a big heart and while she may not be mature enough to articulate her appreciation, I have no doubt that she appreciates your kindness. You could be saving her from so much more than you realize.

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Originally Posted by Heather You have a big heart and while she may not be mature enough to articulate her appreciation, I have no doubt that she appreciates your kindness. You could be saving her from so much more than you realize.

I totally agree with Heather. I heard someone say "when you save a young woman, you save a generation".  It is also true though that you are in a very confusing situation as to how you are going to approach Haley about the issue. I think it would help a lot if you just try to talk to her and be honest with her. It's better than just keeping it by yourself.

You're not really criticizing her as much as her parents.  She didn't pick her parents and it sounds like she doesn't even like them much.   I would try heavy duty pet odor removers. Try talking to the folks about odor removers at the pet store.  Those things usually work pretty well.  Maybe even the vet's office will have ideas.  I have used massive amounts of bleach, hydrogen peroxide, baking soda and of course, odor removers trying to get out drug and cigarette odors when I lived in that stinky apartment.  Since it is mainly clothing that smells bad, ask them to shower and change when they get to your place, immediately bag all the clothes and things in plastic with lots of baking soda.  I think plastic holds odors in better than cloth. 

It sounds like the girl is aware and probably self conscious about her foul smelling family. 

I used to enjoy hitting the bars occasionally and my clothes, hair, and skin would smell pretty rank, so I just hit the showers when I got home and bagged my stinky cloths and wella! no stinky apartment.  I have a feeling this girl's home is eye watering bad not just bar bad.  Poor kid.  *hugs* to her.  You're a sweet mom to help her out and show her a better way of living. 

I wouldn't confront her about the smell, either. She's a teenager and it would only embarrass her, possibly to the point where she would feel too uncomfortable to return to your house. I wouldn't want to do that and I get the feeling that you don't want to, either.

Febreeze air freshner and the fabric spray has done wonders. It doesn't make things smell "covered up," next time you go to the store pick up some to try out. If you only get one, get the air freshner one because I've used it on my coat when I was out of the fabric spray and it worked very well.

Febreeze and Neutra Air work wonders.  I have 2 teenaged boys in my hosue and soemtimes they just stink!  LOL!  Febreeze is the best thing I have ever used, but Neutra Air runs a very close second.  I have used both as air freshners and on clothes, especially the boys shoes (which make the house smell rank!).  Both work great.

I had this problem with JJ when he first came to live with us.  Every time he comes back from visiting his brothers at his parents house, he smells horrible.  I finally had to say something.  I think I phrased it such a way as to make sure he knew it wasn't him, but the odors from his parents house were clinging to his clothing - which then smelled up the furniture and the house.  I didn't make a big deal about it, just mentioned it casually.  It took a few times, but eventually he started changing his clothes as soon as he came home.  Since I have him toss him dirty clothes into the garage to be washed, the smell doesn't stay in the house.  Lenora's plastic bag idea might work instead.  Just let her know that it is not her, but something in her parents home that smells.  Being a teenaged girl, I am sure she will want to make sure SHE doesn't smell.

Febreeze and Neutra Air? hmm. might wanna try these too. you'll never know when you are going to need them.

Oh man, that's tough, I'd be so tempted to hose her stuff down with Febreeze when she's not around.  Kudos to you for being so awesome to her!