BabyUniversity.com › Forums › Ages & Stages › Parenthood › Problems with a hitter
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Problems with a hitter

post #1 of 9
5/22/04 at 11:02pm
Thread Starter 
My 3 year old nephew is a hitter. He hits my children and his brother and sister all the time and 99% of the time it is unprovoked. I have a 7 month old baby and today he went up and hit her in the head for no reason. He has layed on her when she was on the floor and put her in a headlock when I turned my back. We cannot leave him alone with any of the other kids because he will just walk up and hit them. He really scares me at times.

My brother is a single parent and we are unsure of how to deal with this.
Reply
post #2 of 9
5/23/04 at 1:56am
i hope that Dr Bartell can give you some insight into this Meagan.....that is a tough thing to deal wtih
Reply
post #3 of 9
5/23/04 at 8:02am
Can't wait to hear her answer -- I'm having similiar problems with Cody. Although, in his mind, he's provoked. He gets upset about anything and the fists start flying. Last week, he hit his teacher. When I asked him why, he said she called him a baby. I know better ... so I'm not sure where that came from.

Good luck Meagan .. I know it's frustrating on your part and your brother's too. I'm afraid to take Cody anywhere for fear he'll get mad and hit somebody else's kid.
Reply
post #4 of 9
5/23/04 at 9:47am
Thread Starter 
No he really is unprovoked...he just walks in the room and will go up and hit someone or scratch them on the face or pinch etc. etc.
Reply
post #5 of 9
5/23/04 at 10:02am
I hope Dr Bartell can give you some answers!
Reply
post #6 of 9
5/23/04 at 2:06pm
Sounds like you really need some help. What does your brother say when you tell him about the problem?
Reply
post #7 of 9
5/23/04 at 4:29pm
Thread Starter 
He is the one that wanted me to ask. He is fully aware of it and very concerned.
Reply
post #8 of 9
6/3/04 at 4:50pm
Thread Starter 
Thought I would bump this up in case Dr. Bartell missed it.
Reply
post #9 of 9
6/4/04 at 12:45pm
Hi Meagan,
sorry I've taken so long to respond, this is a very, very busy time of year for me with work and publishing deadlines, but now you have my full attention! When a three year old hits and hurts others that much it is very different than a younger, preverbal child who hits because he is frustrated. By three a child should not be exhibiting this type of behavior so frequently. A few thoughts come to mind in thinking about this issue. First, I wonder if he has any expressive language difficulties. It is common for children to hit when they are upset or frustated and don't have the vebal skills to express themselves. It is also much more common for boys to have language delays than girls. My other thought is that living with a single father may be causing some stress in the family in general. For example, what is the child care situation like when he is working, do the children have issues w/ not having a mother around (is she in the picture at all?) How does dad do as a single dad? Are there other emotional issues in the family in general, unrelated to single parenting, that could be contributing to his behavior.

Keep in mind that a three year old who hits this much is telling you something and you need to figure out what it is. I wonder if it would be useful for dad to speak to a therapist/counselor to see if he can get some help. Hope this helps.
Reply
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Parenthood
BabyUniversity.com › Forums › Ages & Stages › Parenthood › Problems with a hitter